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About Literature / Hobbyist :3Male/United Kingdom Groups :icontea-lovers: Tea-Lovers
The world runs on eccentricitea!
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Deviant for 8 Years
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Statistics 172 Deviations 43,625 Comments 54,819 Pageviews

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My Tea Collection (Kit Form) by QuintonCharles My Tea Collection (Kit Form) :iconquintoncharles:QuintonCharles 6 134 My Tea Collection (2012) by QuintonCharles My Tea Collection (2012) :iconquintoncharles:QuintonCharles 21 198 The Photographer by QuintonCharles The Photographer :iconquintoncharles:QuintonCharles 4 172 Literature Buddies by QuintonCharles Literature Buddies :iconquintoncharles:QuintonCharles 5 46 Cat Overlord of Sector 32-A1 by QuintonCharles Cat Overlord of Sector 32-A1 :iconquintoncharles:QuintonCharles 5 34 Inspiration Map by QuintonCharles Inspiration Map :iconquintoncharles:QuintonCharles 3 4
'Jam is a shorter word than marmalade, yet it spreads just as far.' – Jeremy's granddad.
Well, now that that's out of my system, I better bring this story to a close. I guess I'm only really stalling it because I'm scared at the thought of not actually having a reason to open this rather large Word file. I really should get around to finishing it, though, because… well, heck. It'll free up some time – rather, those times when I can actually be bothered to open up Word and let my fingers buzz away on the battered keyboard of this laptop (this story file, or ramifications thereof, has seen three laptops of mine, I believe) – to write some other stories. Other ones that people are likely to read. Ones with decent plots, and things – you know, the sorts of things that make good stories. Yeah…
"That map wasn't much different from the last one… the one that happened about 38 chapters before i
:iconquintoncharles:QuintonCharles 1 2
Vici Map by QuintonCharles Vici Map :iconquintoncharles:QuintonCharles 0 2
'The ultimate evil is to leave the company of the living before you die.' - Anonymous
You were probably expecting the title of this chapter to not be Vici, because you probably thought that I would want to 'lure' you into presuming that the silliness of this story means that everything must be parodied or made original.
Well, perhaps I was lacking inspiration for something original. And anyway, there are loads of supposedly original ones out there anyway: Veni, Vidi, Vomit, for example.
I think my problem lies in my lack of reading fiction. Recently, the only books I've read have been non-fiction biographies, New Scientist magazines, some rather old books about Sigmund Freud's ideas, and a book expressing the hilarity (and fear-invoking awfulness) of mythic trials and… all the rest of it.
I need to pick up a Rankin, or a Reeve, or a Wells, or an Adams, or a Clarke, or a Johnson. That's Boris Johnson, by the w
:iconquintoncharles:QuintonCharles 1 2
65,535 deviations. by QuintonCharles 65,535 deviations. :iconquintoncharles:QuintonCharles 0 22
'Without chaos, nothing can exist; without order, nothing can evolve.' - Anonymous
But, the bubble of captivity that you were placed in… it would remain stable so long as The Reader is confident in the character I portrayed…?
Surely you've answered your own questioning statement there: you weren't very good at doing 'a me'. Your arrogance showed through quite clearly, and your lack of control of italics was… facetious and poor, to be quite frank.
"Is this some form of irony?"
"I doubt it, Phil."
"Well… you know: dramatic irony is when the audience knows something the characters don't. When the characters know something the audience doesn't… what constitutes knowledge?"
"Is that the Word of God or something?"
"You just wanted to fit that in somewhere."
"Yes. Yes I did. Now answer my question."
This is EXACTLY why I started plotting to end this story. It's stupid, it goes nowhere and it's a
:iconquintoncharles:QuintonCharles 0 0
'Without order, nothing can exist; without chaos, nothing can evolve.' - Anonymous
…Is he gone? Good – probably getting tea or something.
"Oh, look. It's The Author. How… inconsequential."
What does that mean?
"It doesn't."
I believe an explanation is in order.
"Didn't I say that?"
No, you didn't.

Right, yes, well. You see gentlemen: I was busy thinking of an ultimate explanation to everything - a sort of, justification, if you want. I thought long and hard about it all, and I must say it's quite a shocker of an explanation, albeit mostly conspicuous and unintentionally insipid… seemingly uninspired, too. Ingeniously, I have thus concluded that all of this nonsense is fully comprehendible through the logic behind its existence in the Bermuda Triangle. Everybody knows crazy stuff happens in that unfathomable, mysterious place – who's to s
:iconquintoncharles:QuintonCharles 0 4
This title does not exist.
"I'm sorry, what?"
"Where's the title?"
"Where's the quote?"
"Where's the text?"
"What text?"
"Why isn't there any text up there?"
"Up where?"
"Can't you see?"
"See what?"
"Who knows?"
"That's actually a very good question."
"…Wait, who was that last ellipsis from? I counted four from everyone but me – this is Pit by the way, not Bakura; we seem to be lacking speech citations still – and that last one... Who was it?"
"I think it was the page."
"It was."
"Who said that?"
"Me. The page."
"Eh, what?"
"My, the apropos."
"Does that even make sense?"
"Okay, I'm really lost here. Who is who saying what and what is going on?"
"I don't know."
"I mean honestly guys, I didn't think something could go beyond making absolutely no sense at all, but here we are."
"HOW DOES THAT MAKE YOU FEEL?" boomed the big blue demon.
"Wait, who was that?" questioned the angel.
:iconquintoncharles:QuintonCharles 1 38
Oh Fiddlesticks

Oh Fiddlesticks

‘Three Rules of Work: Out of clutter find simplicity; from discord find harmony; In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity.’ – Albert Einstein
To explain my lack of intervention as an author: I’ve been away.
You see, I’ve been thinking about things… you know - what exactly I’m going to do to finish this book. How I’m going to do it and all that. I’m awfully bamboozled, dare I say.
Let it be iterated beyond exasperation that one should never, ever write or start a story that will ultimately have no, eh, ultimate conclusion or plot or anything. It is not only difficult, but infuriatingly distressing, with lackadaisical - rather disastrous – results.
For what was meant to be an English project to be handed in after roughly six months from being set is now almost three years overdue and very, very bad.
Though then again, that awfulness is heavily inflicted by my fundame
:iconquintoncharles:QuintonCharles 0 0
To Meet One's Maker

To Meet One's Maker
'I am ready to meet my maker. Whether my maker is prepared to meet me is another matter.' – Winston Churchill
"So, wait…you're not the main antagonists?"
"I doubt it."
"Then who on whatever Earth we're on, is?"
"I don't know."
"Why not damn it!?"
"Because this book is stupid and uneventful."
"Speaking of stupid and uneventful…are you cured, Phil?"
"…Yes. I am."
"Oh jolly good. Shall we continue?"
"Where?" intruded Bakura.
"…That's a good point."
"Hey Doug," Phil spluttered with interest (don't ask me how he did), "you managed to get in here: how do we get out?"
"Haven't I already been asked?"
"Probably, but I don't know. The title's too big; it's blocking the way of seeing the text previously."
"Wait, whoa – why's the title so big?"
"I don't know."
"Superfluously big, I'd say."
"Hey, don't blame me. I can assure you, it was not me."
"Don't worry Phil, I wasn't blaming
:iconquintoncharles:QuintonCharles 2 0
V for Vignette
V for Vignette
'That which can be thought is not true.' – Hindu Proverb
'I think therefore I am.' – René Descartes

Some of you may have been wondering about the last chapter's title. Well don't. It might damage your health.
"Hello boys," said the almighty man who fell from the sky.
"Err, hello…Doug, if I may."
"You may by such a sobriquet."
"Oh God, he's not going to talk in rhyme is he?"
"I bloody well hope not," ejaculated Pit.
"Let me expostulate on problem gentlemen: one has gotten oneself into such a predicament as to vindicate a vindication of negativity – what does one do?"
"I didn't catch a word of that."
"I'd probably suggest one gets out of there," said Pit, passively.
"Indeed one must," agreed Doug.
"Well so far he's not helping," turned Phil.
"Then boys, gentlemen, let it be suggested upon one to get the hell out of here."
"You know, V doesn't just stand for Vignette..."
:iconquintoncharles:QuintonCharles 1 0


Thank you - QuintonCharles by MicoNutziri Thank you - QuintonCharles :iconmiconutziri:MicoNutziri 2 4 Princess Tereya! by Leafions Princess Tereya! :iconleafions:Leafions 23 13 Pitster by HipsterDarkLink Pitster :iconhipsterdarklink:HipsterDarkLink 63 21 for a very special butt by MayTheEleventh for a very special butt :iconmaytheeleventh:MayTheEleventh 24 41 Pitty pit pit by Chocoriina Pitty pit pit :iconchocoriina:Chocoriina 71 10 Smoking Ape by Eugene-Siryk Smoking Ape :iconeugene-siryk:Eugene-Siryk 493 64 City on the Big Bridge by arvalis City on the Big Bridge :iconarvalis:arvalis 5,369 145 Rise of Azazel by QuantomStarBox Rise of Azazel :iconquantomstarbox:QuantomStarBox 4 8 Vertical Urban Sprawl by JakeMurray Vertical Urban Sprawl :iconjakemurray:JakeMurray 273 43 Happy birthday Charu by sunshine12313 Happy birthday Charu :iconsunshine12313:sunshine12313 4 11 Flight by Kydeka Flight :iconkydeka:Kydeka 393 54 .:: HB Quint ::. by Kazu-Seme .:: HB Quint ::. :iconkazu-seme:Kazu-Seme 30 8 Cogweb by Jake-in-a-box Cogweb :iconjake-in-a-box:Jake-in-a-box 3 0


(Before I begin the review, I'll just say that the ratings are based on this at face-value, disregarding completely how English is not ...

(I'm judging this by the first two pages, by the way.) This looks, as others have said, promising - and certainly interesting. I haven'...

This is a very pretty piece, and your effort really shows in the dynamic creases of the clothes and the fairly elaborate (and pretty) b...

Not sure why you want critiques, but whatever... :meow: Firstly, I'll explain my ratings. I've gave 4/5 for vision since you did well to rem...


haven't written one of these for a long time

just hit 50,000 pageviews sheeeeiit

haven't uploaded anything since my tea collection in 2013, lord

well it's nearly summer, so I might throw some of the half-finished shiterature online, mostly unedited hur

i'm more active (marginally) on youtube, soundcloud, tumblr - hell even twitter now

i trust y'all are well holla at me <3
  • Listening to: HHHHHHHhHhhhhhhhhhhhhh
  • Reading: hhhhhhhH
  • Playing: hHhHhH
  • Eating: HHHHHHHHHH
  • Drinking: hhhhhhh


QuintonCharles's Profile Picture
Artist | Hobbyist | Literature
United Kingdom
Anything I write here is likely to sound arrogant or pretentious, so I shall refrain from writing anything about myself. :stare:


14.19 seconds.
Presumably I'm 9,327,532.


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MayTheEleventh Featured By Owner Apr 26, 2015
QuintonCharles Featured By Owner Apr 26, 2015  Hobbyist Writer
oh gOd i wasn't even expectin bibthday messages on here omg THANK YOU <3
MayTheEleventh Featured By Owner May 12, 2015
np charlito!!
i hope u had a gr8 one you big warm poop
QuintonCharles Featured By Owner May 16, 2015  Hobbyist Writer
hehhhh yes tho' i'm back at uni with exams on the horizon wOOP
uhnevermind Featured By Owner Apr 26, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
happy birthdaY M8
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